The Fight Against Failurism

What are the writers of your time like?

Friday, July 21, 2006

Bad News

There are two types of anti-failurists - those who bad news will bend but not break, and those who are completely shattered by it. Some, upon hearing of their friends being shot and an attempted murder investigation underway, will lose themselves in their fantasy world, trying to shut out reality. Others will throw aside their pen, keyboard or mungo-bot - and bury their heads in their hands in depair.

Which are you???

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Waste Time

Spend time on irrelevant or minor issues is usually a sign of the F disease.
For example, taking photos and posting on stranger's blog...
Trying to perfect a map for a submission package...
Updating blogs...

In fact, the last one of these is probably the most dangerous. I shall shortly be preparing a treatise on the subject.

Other symptoms

We will continue means of fighting failurism again, but time now for a quick aside:
Symptoms of Failurism! (Some of them!)

One of the most disliked among his peers - General Lassitude
A willingness to undertake any stupid activity other than writing
A great love for the television set, computer games, even spider solitare!
Lack of follow through or completion
Extreme clumsiness
Itchy ears
Strog thirst

Monday, July 17, 2006

No *

Yes, indeed, having a worthwhile hero - such as The Prisoner - is a good source of inspiration, therefore I make :
No. 8: The prisoner as role model
No 9: Have a pen & paper always to hand... reminding you...of words...and writing that you could be doing....

Saturday, July 15, 2006

The Prisoner...

Paddy Fitz reminded me in a most timely way. Remember the Prisoner? He was stuck in a village from which it was EXTREMELY difficult, almost impossible, to escape from. He never - for one second - allowed himself to think that he could not get out. And that, chucks, is the attitude which will defeat failurism (Defeat? Failurism doesn't get a look in!)! Be like him, wear the blazer if you must, but make your attitude reflect his!

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Deadly Distraction...

No. 7: Whatever you do, do NOT start a blog! They take up too much time and cost too much - look at me! No time to write any more and my phone bill going through the roof and still climbing!

Sensible Talk

No 5: As all sensible but dull people will tell you - fresh air! Strangely enough, a nice walk can help blow away the vestiges of failurism. But if you can throw in some sunshine and a good seascape, all the better!

No - No, I can't say it!: Reading some good literature! I suggest "Leaf" by Mungo, "The Mark of the Wolf" and "In Search of the Moon" by I.M.Murphy, or any of the St Brigid's series by Geri Valentine.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Sequence is not everything

I would like to mention that these weapons against failurism are not necessarily in order of importance (shield strengths will be allotted later!)
No. 3 Mungo. His catch phrase "Writing is easy!" has turned many a failurist along a better path

No. 4 The Disresponsible Nodpots. Need I say more???

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Precautions Against Failurism

As I explained the other day, there are a number of things you can do to ward off failurism.
No. 1: Eat lots of Smartie chocolate and orange ripples (Note: if Failurism has ever gripped you, no matter how cured you feel, eating either of these lovely products is most likely to bring about a re-occurence of the dread disease).
2. Have a large photograph of an inspiring figure. The obvious one is Marvin - he is St George in Failurism terms, or if you like your analogies less exalted, Van Helsing...

To be continued...

Monday, July 10, 2006

Never vanished completely...

Ah failurism! An old friend - well, an old enemy really. Strikes you down in the flower of your youth - it's very difficult to recover fully from it. I suppose there is no cure really - you have to learn to live with it, and keep it under control. Or else it will control you...

Thursday, July 06, 2006

The worst & purest strain

In its very worst and deadliest form - indeed, some people hold the only true form - failurism attacks Disresponsible Nodpots. It is tragic to see a brave Nodpot, once an inspiring figure, succumb to failurism. It is too late when it strikes to attempt the usual innoculation of orange ripples and smartie chocolate, which, once the disease has got hold of its victim, tend to aggravate the complaint.
Tomorrow - some of hte precautions you can take to protect yourself against it!

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

To Snuggles

Dear Snuggles, yes, indeed you have a problem if you start seeing invisible rabbits, invisible men or invisible paychecques. A not so serious outbreak is that of seeing the following disappearing - ink, cottages or money! Actually, the latter is always serious!
A word of caution - the above symptoms have been documented as some of failurisms symptoms or side-effects - they do not necessarily mean that you have the Dread Disease.
More on this fascinating subject tomorrow...

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

It's a many-headed beast

Most people have experienced failurism in one form or another during their lives, or seen it affect their family or friends. For some, it's an aversion to a previously enjoyed pleasure. For others, it's an overwhelming fear of completion. Sometimes it breaks out as a rash between your fingers or toes. Again, it can take hallucinary forms (giant invisible rabbits), or haunt your dreams... But in which ever form you suffer (and please let me know if you have a really bizarre outbreak of it - I am currently researching a book on this subject), there are means of living with it and overcoming it. Keep an eye on this blog for all the answers!

Other famous instances

There are many other famous, infamous and unheard of cases of failurism in the history of our race. Of course, I intend to approach this subject in strictly chronological order (which many take years) but just to give you a taster:
Jane Austen - couldn't complete her seventh & final novel, Sandition due to a sudden sharp attack of the disease
Abe Lincoln - took years of rehab to get over his aversion to Opera
Buzz Aldrin, it is rumoured, had his first and last attack of this dreaded disease on July 20th 1969...
And these are just some of the less well known cases

Thank you

Thank you to the kind commentator who evinced such an intelligent interest in this subject - I trust you do not suffer from the condition yourself? Maybe you are concerned that you might be infected...??? Tell me your symptoms! (And to smart alec-y people who use fancy French words to sound superior - just hope you never suffer from the F Disease!)

The History ...

Failurism has a very long and varied history. It was first spotted among neolithic man, where the constant effort to create fire by rubbing two stones together disheartened many a cave dweller (who subsequently died from eating too much cold porridge) ... More of this history, the first formal identification of the condition, the symptoms and the cures will follow over the next few years. Keep watching!

Monday, July 03, 2006

Who next...?

I mean, well, didn't you read my last entry? I mean, I used that very expression twice - I am deeply ashamed...

The Fight continues

In a strange kind of way, I wish this blog could be open to all. I mean, I appreciate your comments (especially yours, Anonymous!). I mean, failurism is a deadly disease, and probably much more widespread than any of us think! But it's up to all of us to fight it!

Sunday, July 02, 2006

A word from Mango

Hi! Mango here! Stole VT's password and logged in to put something interesting here.
Mungo is the GREATEST! He has written his first wonderful book called LEAF. I'm going to star in its sequel! Silly agents haven't yet realised what a goldmine it is (Pixar, come this way!), but they will!
Watch out - Mungo's arrived on the literary scene! In fact, Mungo is the literary scene!

One last word for today...

Still no comments...

Failurism Spreads

Well, the fight continues.
I am particularly worried about Mungo. You know Mungo? Well, perhaps not. Not yet, anyway, but soon you will. Have a look at Mango's Hero link. Anyway, Mungo was one of the most inspiring Nodpot members you could imagine - his motto Writing is easy! - alone should ensure his posterity. But now he has DOUBTS (my word, not his).
I felt momentarily shattered, but I quickly pulled the pieces back together - after all, the warriors must prepare to fight.
The fight begins.
The fight to save Mungo!

Sunday July 2nd...

Well, my blog has been active for ten or fifteen minutes so far, and I have not yet received any comments, jokes or threats! But let me warn all you failurists out there - the war on failurism has begun!

A Bad Beginning

July, 2nd, 2006. It's Sunday, and it's hot and sticky in the house (need to get it cleaned!). It's possibly hot and sticky outside too. Mungo is hiding in the livingroom, looking for cues, sorry, clues. But I have seen something today that I thought I would never see - in those few little words on Mungo's Blog - I just couldn't be bothered -
I know now that Mungo has been infected...